I wrote a note to my pastor last month telling her what I really think of her. Now that I have your attention, I’ll tell you I wrote it because last month was Pastor Appreciation month. Even though I don’t like to allow the greeting card industry to dictate my behavior, sometimes it does, and in this case it is appropriate. It reminded me to share some of the things I think but neglect to communicate. Yet, as I reflect on that brief note, I am aware of more that I could have  mentioned. Here are just a few of the things I could have included. I admire her for her:

Flexibility and creativity during the pandemic: Scrambling to transition to online services with extremely little notice forced her to do church in a way no one was accustomed to. She negotiated the “mask or no mask” controversy with grace and wisdom.  At our church it helped that there were two distinct sections of the sanctuary that are spatially separate. Watching the complexity of that dance made this retired pastor repeatedly comment to his wife, “I’m sure glad I’m not a pastor now.” Thank you, Pastor, for learning to dance this dance without any previous lessons.

Navigating the perilous dangers of speaking in today’s political climate: I retired in 2017 shortly after the presidential election of 2016. I recall one person in our congregation telling me, “I’m sorry Pastor, I can no longer attend this church because I voted democratic.” Then not long after a second person said, “I voted republican. I’m not sure I belong here.” Though the political climate was acrimonious back then, it was child’s-play compared to the vitriol and violence we experience today. Thank you, Pastor, for steering a straight course through the perilous waters of our political cesspool. You’ll never please everyone, but I appreciate your biblical and loving attention to some of the big issues our country faces.

Carrying the weight of individual and corporate challenges: Recently I attended the funeral visitation for a friend’s deceased spouse. Our pastor was there gracefully offering words of comfort, consolation, and hope. Though I am not present as she attends to many of the personal needs in our church family, I know there is no shortage of pastoral problems and concerns she addresses. Not long ago, our church experienced a fire. For a year we met in the local high school auditorium. Our pastor managed expectations, grumbling, and financial challenges with grace. And this is in addition to overseeing staff, leadership teams, budgets and a building. 

Connecting with others outside of our community: Our church seeks to be a church that focuses on transformation “for the sake of others.” Whether it is supporting the local food pantry or sharing our building with a Hispanic congregation worshipping amidst our largely white population, we are given the opportunity to engage with the needs of those around us. On Saturdays members of our two churches get together to pray. Recently, we’ve been praying for their members who are fearful of being deported or even racially profiled. She also gives space to allow our congregation to contribute to a few global concerns. Even though I sometimes feel overwhelmed with the information overload of the twenty-four-hour news cycle, I find it helpful to have concrete ways of contributing to global needs. 

Remaining a shepherd in a church culture that demands other primary roles: Our pastor seeks to be a shepherd amidst the voices that call for pastors to primarily be vision-casters, CEOs or celebrities. While she does cast vision and attends to the corporate side of the church, she remains a woman of prayer and pastoral care. She obeys the call to “be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care, watching over them – not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be. . . “ Thank you, Pastor, for being an undershepherd to the Chief Shepherd.

Keeping a sense of herself while staying connected to her community: I love that our pastor has interests and friends outside the circle of our congregation and that she actively engages with her family in spite of the pressing demands of ministry. But I’m even more appreciative that she gives attention to the cultivation of her own soul. I sense that she seeks to operate from a spiritual center that is deeper than the chattering voices and the media circus that surround her. She gives space in her life for connection with the divine, engaging in practices the Transforming Center has reinforced in my own life.

Now that I’ve told you some of the things I didn’t say, I think I’ll send her what I’ve written above. Yet, as I consider this, I am aware that many of these affirmations can be said about a number of pastors I know. And these pastors may or may not receive an abundance of notes and emails of affirmation. But I can almost guarantee they’ve received some critical missives, perhaps even some that are anonymous. Isn’t it strange that for some odd reason, we allow those barbs to rattle around and penetrate into the crevasses of our brain? And while it may be wise to discern the kernels of truth that criticisms contain, it serves no purpose to allow our detractors to negatively shape the way we view ourselves or our ministries. Rather, it is helpful to remember and even savor the encouragement we receive from those we serve. I am reminded of the words in 1 Peter 5:4 that the most significant note of affirmation comes from the One whom we serve. “And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that will never fade away.”